There are two major groups of hurdles to crossplay - technical and political. Both of these issues were primarily ironed out by Epic in late 2018, and then they opened up the doors for everybody else by releasing their set of crossplay tools and tech to the public for free.
On the technical side, the various walled garden networks - PSN, XBL, Nintendo Online - each have their own set of protocols, ports, technology, etc. They do not talk to each other or transfer information in the same way. There's a good reason for this - they weren't built by the same people or using the same technology, so their internal workings are all different. In order to solve this, the any third party developer needs to build a system that can take data from any supported service and translate it in real time so all players on other platforms understand what's happening in the game. This requires a fairly hefty engineering effort.
On the political side, console platform networks are walled gardens that generate a lot of revenue for the platforms. Every sale within that walled garden typically earns the platform owner a 30% cut. This is why they can afford to sell game consoles at a loss, they hope to make it back from their users. Allowing other players on other platforms to play with their users takes away from their exclusivity. This attitude permeates their certification rules, which are then enforced on all third party developers. Even now that crossplay is allowed, there are a lot of rules in place about things like communication between platforms (e.g. Rocket League was not allowed to let Playstation players communicate with PC players because of potential content ratings).
In 2018, Epic pushed to allow crossplay for their lifestyle game juggernaut Fortnite. Microsoft had already been dabbling in that arena by allowing Xbox to play with PC players (since most players ran on Windows anyway, so they were both Microsoft platforms), but Sony refused. Epic smoothed this over by paying Sony a significant sum of money to 'make up for lost revenue' and developing their own tools and technology to handle the technical issues of allowing crossplay. Sony begrudgingly agreed, so Fortnite went crossplay. Then, in typical fashion, Epic released their entire suite of crossplay tools to the public for free. Games like Dauntless and Rocket League soon followed to crossplay, and by 2019 Sony had changed their stance to accept crossplay.
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